People shout at me. It’s OK; usually they’re nice. Sometimes they aren’t. Once in a blue moon, they’re just plain odd. I need to know why! It bugs me how some folk just have no command of their wits, decide it’s a good idea to shout at a stranger and then do not seem to think “hang on, I’m a fucking nutter!”

These are some things I have had shouted at me over the last year or so:

• Oi! Chipper. (Not a clue what this means.)
• Hey, Cube! (Uh…square? is that what you’re getting at?)
• Get off the road you Twazack. (Twat + wazack – Twazack? Plus…I wasn’t on the road…)
• Oi mate, where’s your fanny? (This was called out as I bit into a choc ice)
• Blondie (!!!!)
• Oi, you! Postman Pat! (I don’t wear a uniform, I am not a postman, I don’t drive a van, and I don’t have a black and white cat or wear glasses. What the FUCK?)
• You look like a jute (vegetable fibre-string?)

What makes people shout random shit at strangers? I think we, (or social anthropologists…or at the very least some students) should conduct some kind of research into this…

Troubling. Very troubling.