Baby Diary – 31 weeks

Ill

I started out with the intention to keep this baby column
weekly but it’s been nearly a month since my last baby update. There are a
couple of reasons and one is that Dillon has been ill. He got an infected toe
(we’re not sure how) and needed antibiotics for a week, this was followed by a
temperature for a couple of days and he’s had a cough for nearly a month. It is
scary and a panic when I hear any sniffle. Keep well baby D!

Controlled Crying

Dillon is nearly 7 months old and life is starting, just
starting to get easier. Bless his heart, Dillon has been sleeping through the
night for the last few weeks.  To get
there we had to go down the ‘controlled crying’ route. At first I didn’t want
to. We did the pick up, put down approach which is comfort the baby then leave him,
repeat as necessary, but when repeat is many times throughout the night it got
too much for both of us (stamina, exhaustion, feeding in desperation).

So what is controlled crying? Basically you leave your baby
to cry themselves to sleep. It’s not in a horrible, ignore the baby kind of
way, it’s in a loving, have I checked the baby and after feeding, winding,
changing, checking if teething, temperature, breathing is everything else ok
and telling him you love him and putting the lights out, you let him cry his
little heart out until he falls asleep. Yes it feels heartless and horrible and
wrong. But our little boy is 80 percentile he’s not going to waste away from
lack of milk and booby at night he can definitely sleep without it. After some
reassurance from my friend, we let Dillon cry himself to sleep and he cried for
about 20 mins. The next night between 10 and 15 mins. That was it. Joy!  For 10 hours the baby is asleep and I am free.
Freedom!

Nursery

Dillon has started at nursery two days a week so that I can
attend Uni two days a week. Oh the guilt of leaving him with someone else. But
the staff are really nice, the nursery has a good vibe about it and it does me
some good to be in an intellectual environment twice a week. I worry about him,
but he’s a sociable, loving baby, I think he’s happy there.  At six months old he’s also the youngest baby at
the nursery as most people go back to work after maternity leave of 9 months to
one year, another reason to feel guilty. But he seems to be getting a lot of
attention from the staff as the youngest, neediest baby which makes me feel
better. He also hasn’t formed that strong attachment to me yet, so when I say
bye bye, he doesn’t notice me leave, he’s busy eyeing up the toys and the other
babies.

Easier for Dad to
Leave the House

Since he’s working full time it’s easier for Dillon’s dad to
get out of the house 5 days a week. Sometimes I’ve been a little jealous that
he gets to leave, in a thoughtless grass is always greener way. Because I know how
well tended the lawn is on my side of the fence. And I’m not talking lady
garden. I’m happier being at home with Dillon. The gig that Dad went to which
turned into a 24 hour absence felt a bit much, especially when it looked set to
repeat the next weekend (but it’s not happening now). I appreciate that we both
need a break and we take it in turns to babysit.  Yes I’ve missed a lot of theatre before and
after Dillon was born, but I’ve read a lot of books, watched a lot of TV,
films, listened to radio, even got to the cinema (thanks to the Baby Scream
club), met up with other mums at Baby Sensory classes and my NCT group and with
my mum friends, we’ve taken Dillon to baby swimming classes, even church once a
month. The isolation I had felt is diminishing – just got to get out with the
baby!

Pushchairs

Dillon’s travel system has been good in a lot of ways but
boy is his car seat heavy and the whole thing is bulky, so we’re looking into a
lightweight pushchair to make it easier when dropping him off at nursery. I just
don’t understand why the majority of pushchairs are designed so that the baby
faces forwards (not towards mum).  I only
see problems with it, because to check on your child you have to stop, walk to the
front, deal with your baby then return to the back. Anytime your baby cries,
needs a drink or food, has a runny nose, their clothing needs adjusting you’ve
got to stop and go to the front of the pushchair (and when it’s crowded on the
pavement annoy all the pedestrians behind you).

More (inexpensive) rear facing pushchairs please!

Happy Halloween

© Wendy Thomson 2011

Wendy Thomson is the editor of www.femalearts.com an online publication
which promotes women in the arts and in business.