DIANE HARDING ON HER HARROWING MEMOIR, ALWAYS IN THE DARK

My memoir ‘Always in the Dark’ tells of secrets, scandal and survival.  It is an extraordinary account of my bizarre homelife and is my search for answers from a family shrouded in secrets.  A mysterious tale of growing up, unbeknown to me, with my mother trapped in a menage a trois on a continent from which there was no escape, it tells of her selflessness, sacrifice and of putting others first.

After my parents emigrated post war, my idyllic and cosy childhood was ruined at the age of three after the arrival of a mysterious and glamorous visitor with my roller coaster existence and mother’s mental breakdown adding to my confusion during my formative years.

Although the first half of the mystery unfolded in the leafy suburbs of Cape Town, after moving to England at the age of fourteen the scandal continued to follow us around.  It was obvious my home life was a weird one and it was only after my mother’s death decades later that I rummaged through her secret box and discovered a wealth of staggering information I did not know about, the unimaginable circumstances cleverly hidden from me during my early years.  But I was a young child when it all began and the fact that I had lived my life to the point of naivety was beyond baffling.  But it was my mother’s life-long confidante, her sister Linda, who supplied me with many missing pieces of the puzzle and whose revelations helped clarify many of my childhood mysteries including the reason why I was to be an only child.

Making my heinous discovery was difficult to grasp and the realisation that I had lived through the trauma as the child of the victim equally upsetting; rage, bitterness, anger and a disbelief that my childhood had been dismantled by greed and my mother treated with such humiliation consuming me.  And because of the hurt and embarrassment my shocking revelation was not something I felt willing to talk about, least of all with my husband, a secret I kept from him for two long years.

The search for the truth sent me on numerous missions to talk with close friends and family only to discover that I was the last to know, hence the title ‘Always in the Dark’.

For too long domestic abuse has been a hidden issue and in order to raise aware of the horrors of coercive control I am now on a mission to encourage people to open up and tell their story which for me has been life changing.  It is a known fact that it is particularly hard for older people to open up and will experience abuse for twice as long before seeking help compared to those who are younger.  Writing my memoir has not been an easy ride but out of it has come great solace which has allowed me to come to terms with my past and move on.  I did not want to be someone with a massive grudge, determined never to allow my past to spoil my future.

This is a book about final freedom, my openness which I hope will help others to come forward and speak out and to understand that however traumatic a situation there is hope and a way through to happiness.  I am a firm believer that to experience the tough times gives us backbone in order to cope with what life throws our way.

 

 

 

 

 

WRITERS ON THE ROAD: PATSY COLLINS

Hi! I’m Patsy Collins aka The Travelling Writer. Ten years ago I was a tour guide. That job kept me in one place but ever since being made redundant and becoming a full time writer I’ve spent a lot of time travelling – mostly in a campervan shared with my husband. We’re on the road for three months a year, so naturally I write in the van. So much so that I often refer to R’ten as the mobile writing retreat. She’s absolutely perfect for that. She’s also a pretty good photography base for Gary.

There are things about a campervan which may initially seem like disadvantages, such as limited internet access and restricted space, but are really the opposite. When we can go online it’s all too easy to ‘just quickly look that up’ and get distracted by emails, funny memes, brilliant opportunities to submit our work if we ever get it finished… If we have to go into another room to make a cup of tea, we don’t always return to the keyboard the moment the kettle has boiled. Even the limited power supply can be a plus, because it encourages me to get the words down straight away, rather than wasting battery power faffing about.

Sometimes the places we visit for Gary’s work inspire my stories. Sometimes we spend time in an area so I can write my novels and short stories ‘on location’. It’s really useful to be able to literally walk in my characters’ footsteps along the beach, up a mountain or through town. I enjoy seeing what they see, eating what they do, even sharing a few of their mishaps – my research has occasionally been more thorough than intended!

One of my six novels, Leave Nothing But Footprints, is actually set in a campervan, and that’s where it was written, even if it wasn’t always parked in the same country as Jess and Eliot took their own trip. Although the storyline is nothing like my own life, some of the small details are based on reality. I think they help make the story believable, and using them in a positive way helps me feel better about some of our mini disasters in the early days. Oh, and I might sometimes try convincing Gary to unleash his romantic side for the good of the current WIP!

Another book written entirely in R’ten is From Story Idea to Reader; an easily accessible guide to writing fiction, co written with Rosemary J Kind. We know each other well, but didn’t physically meet during the writing stage as when she was in England we were in Scotland, and when we came home she went to Switzerland. We did park the van on her drive while we worked on the promotion stuff though.

Having the van, and being able to go where we like has enabled me to deliver writing workshops and attend events which wouldn’t be practical if they couldn’t be incorporated into a working trip.

Of course the locations we visit provide distractions. We’ve parked up on beaches, in the depths of forests, at the foot of mountains, alongside rivers, in the grounds of a castle, in view of seals and otters or surrounded by wild deer … But I’ve been a writer for over twenty years now and have learned to accept the ups and downs which that entails.

If you’d like to learn more about me and my writing, then please visit patsycollins.uk where you’ll find links to all my books and lots more photos from my campervan adventures.

PUBLICATION SPECIAL: NEW BEGINNINGS FOR THE SURPLUS GIRLS BY POLLY HERON

I have loved every Surplus Girls book and New Beginnings is no exception. I was drawn into Jess’s story from the moment she appeared on the page. Her position as a working woman with a responsible job, but absolutely no security of tenure when a man came along, made me really think what pioneers the career girls of the 1920s were. The suffragettes may have won us the vote, but the ability of women to prove themselves at work was just as important, although of course we had to wait another fifty years for the Equal Pay Act and even now do not have true equality in every workplace.

The history behind The Surplus Girls books is expertly and meticulously researched, from the big issues like these to the slang names for particular cakes. Each and every detail sings from the page, which is why you feel you are actually there, sitting on the slightly worn sofas of Wilton Road in a suitably genteel manner, chatting to old friends and new.

This is the book that pulls all the strands of the Hesketh sisters’ stories together into a really satisfying ending. No graduate of their school is forgotten in the final chapters, and Jess’s seemingly impossible dilemma is solved as well. A fabulous read.

 

The backdrop to the whole series is the place of women in the world of work, so I asked Polly Heron what sort of research went into it in order to create a variety of different employments in such rich detail.

 

The Surplus Girls series explores the predicament faced by many young women in the aftermath of the Great War. They had grown up expected by society to marry and become housewives and mothers. Then came the war – and a generation of young men perished. Many women lost their sweethearts or fiancés while others, without knowing it, lost the men they would have married had they ever had the chance to meet. This meant that many girls now faced a future in which they would have to provide for themselves, while being regarded as ‘on the shelf’ or ‘old maids’.

The world of work offered women far fewer opportunities than came the way of men. Moreover, a woman doing the same job as a man would typically earn one third less. It was legal to refuse to employ a woman simply because she was a woman and it was considered patriotic to employ a former soldier even if a female candidate would have been more suited to the job. During an interview, an unmarried woman could expect to be grilled about her marriage prospects, because should she marry, the expectation would be that she would leave in order to be a housewife. In plenty of jobs, marriage automatically meant dismissal.

In The Surplus Girls series, I have explored various jobs that would have been open to girls and women in the early 1920s. Each book has a different heroine whom the story centres around, but one of the things that links the books together is that each heroine attends a business school to learn secretarial skills.

I loved delving into the social history of the time and seeking out suitable roles for my characters – ‘suitable’ meaning appropriate to the time, not necessarily the right job for the character personally – as Nancy finds out to her cost in Christmas with the Surplus Girls. In the newly published fourth book, New Beginnings for the Surplus Girls, Jess makes a particularly interesting heroine, as she sees herself as a career woman, not an unfortunate surplus girl. She dreams of creating a successful working life for herself but has to cope with all the disadvantages that women faced at the time.

 

 

 

SUNDAY SCENE: LINDA HUBER ON HER FAVOURITE SCENE FROM THE UN-FAMILY

I write psychological suspense, which isn’t well known for being a ‘cheerful’ genre. Although my books have their fair share of tension, I feel it’s important to include some warmer, happy moments too, whether it’s a touch of humour about something a child says, or an incident to do with a character’s relationship, or – as in my new release The Un-Family – their job. I think this helps to make the characters more real. Psychological suspense is basically about bad things happening to people, and readers are much more likely to sympathise with a character and cheer them on if they come across as realistic, rounded people, in spite of the tense plot and darker moments in the books.

In The Un-Family, Holly is a vet, having huge problems with her husband Dylan’s behaviour as well as smaller (she thinks) ones with his family. One day, however, she goes to look round a wildlife centre where she’ll be taking on some work from then on. Adam, the centre head, shows her round:

 

Holly looked in on a deer with a torn shoulder, a swan with an infected wound on one foot, and a hedgehog, who’d been stuck down a drain and needed fattening up. They walked on round the enclosures, which included two ponds, a home-made badger sett and a row of pens. Holly heaved a happy sigh – this would be such a great place to work.

A gaggle of teenagers on bikes was approaching as they arrived back at the main building, and Adam gave them a wave. ‘The after-school brigade.’

Holly watched as the teenagers dispersed around the buildings. ‘My niece Megan would love this. I’ll suggest she does a stint in the summer holidays.’

‘We always need volunteers. Okay, let’s go back in and sort out when you’ll be here next week. Then I’m heading down to the river to release a duck, now the water level has fallen again. Want to tag along? We’ll release you into the weekend when we’re done.’ He gave her his lop-sided grin.

Good, she’d be home well before Dylan arrived. With him away on his course, tonight would be their only opportunity to spend time with each other all weekend. Holly arranged her first shift for the following Monday and joined Adam in the centre’s green van, the duck in a pet carrier in the back.

He drove the short distance to the river, which was still full, but much less violent now. They walked along the bank to the place the duck had been rescued, and Adam stood back with Fred on his lead while Holly crouched down and opened the pet carrier. What a special moment this was, the first time she’d released a wild creature back into its natural environment.

She waited, motionless, then a yellow beak emerged from the carrier, followed by a beady eye, and three seconds’ flurry later, the mallard was swimming down the river, quacking loudly. Warm satisfaction spread through Holly. This was perfect.

 

Holly’s job turns into her main consolation as the plot develops, and as you can imagine, the wildlife centre provides many such lighter, human moments, and it also provides sanctuary for Holly later in the book. Does everything work out for her and Dylan in the end? You can find out more about The Un-Family on my website www.lindahuber.net

 

SUNDAY SCENE: SUE MOORCROFT ON CREATING HER FICTIONAL MIDDLEDIP

Imagine a tiny village in Cambridgeshire, England…

It boasts one pub, one shop, one café and a garage. Just outside the boundaries stand a performing arts college and a posh hotel, and the Carlysle Estate and home farm snuggle around the village like arms.

I say ‘imagine’ because that’s what I did.

It began on a family car journey when I had a road atlas open on my lap. I loved the place names I was reading…Crowland…Eye…Whaplode Drove. For fun, I filled the gap between them by creating Middledip village and the nearby town of Bettsbrough. As we passed through the real-life village of Eye, I spotted a garage forecourt full of classic cars and mentally transferred it to Middledip village as MAR Motors, Ratty’s garage. A short, black, peacefully grazing pony in a roadside field became Snobby, Gabe’s cantankerous equine buddy. A few miles on, a stone pub looked just right to be The Three Fishes. A shop with one of everything in its window was perfect for Middledip, too, as was the village hall and playing field I borrowed. So Middledip took shape.

As we waited at traffic lights, I watched two women chatting. One, with long, strawberry blonde hair, looked awkward until children joined the conversation, and then suddenly she relaxed, smiling and laughing. That was when Tess Riddell was born – the first character to arrive in Middledip feeling lost and looking for a new beginning. (See Starting Over.)

Ten books on, I have a spreadsheet of characters that my brother maintains for me, because, although every visit to Middledip is a standalone story, I let earlier characters pop up so readers can see how they’re doing. There’s a spreadsheet for places, too, but I rarely need to refer to it because I just know that the cottages are stone, and there are also red-brick Victorian houses, like the neglected property that became The Angel Community Café. My hand-drawn map of Middledip (pictured) is probably the one item I’d try to save if my house burned down! A version can be found on my website here and you can click on the markers to discover where characters from various books live.

This year’s winter story is A White Christmas on Winter Street. As there was a foster carer in the village, Nan Heather, I wanted to bring back one of the children she had fostered – Sky Terran. I give Sky an overwhelming wish not just to visit the village but to truly be part of it, so let her buy a house on the corner of Winter Street. The Corner House has been neglected for so long that it can scarcely be seen behind an explosion of conifers and shrubs. Sky has the task of restoring it to order as part of the process of sorting out her life.

As ‘make friends’ is written at the top of her wish list, I provide her with every opportunity to find them, not just in Winter Street but via the pub quiz or grabbing a coffee at the community café where Christmas shortbread is in the shape of angels. I’ve been told by readers that reading a Middledip novel is like being in a Christmas movie – but I think it must be more like living in a snow globe because the village certainly sees an inordinate amount of snow and frosty wintry weather!

 

 

SUNDAY SCENE: S L ROSEWARNE ON HER FAVOURITE SCENE FROM THE RESCUE

The Rescue is a novel about about second chances, written by a terrier called Moll, who promises her owner, Pip, to look after his wife when he dies.

I wanted to write about what happens when you lose your partner, and how it is terrible, but there can be plenty of life – and love – ahead. Moll was such a strong character, and kept me going through it all, so I felt she should tell this tale.

This scene is Moll’s introduction to the one and only time she has sex. It was quite a challenge to write – how do dogs feel about sex? The point of the scene is that she can understand how her owner, Suki, feels when she meets a man she is very attracted to but, for various reasons, doesn’t want to have sex with him.

 

Errol was a terrier/collie and a real flirt, with huge dark eyes and a wicked sense of humour, who lived in Penryn.

We met on the fields above the sea, and he gambolled over to me and ran away, back and forth, urging me to follow him. Which after a bit I did. He had a musky scent that drove me wild, and we had such fun that afternoon – racing down onto the beach, over the rock pools and back. I felt like a puppy again.

He made me bark with laughter, and nudged against me, and teased me and nuzzled my muzzle until all my cares and worries over Suki disappeared. When I was with him, I felt as if I was the most important bitch in the world.

Errol made me feel like a different dog. I noticed that I was walking strangely, swaying my hips a bit. My tail looked longer and I waved it upright, higher in the air. Even my coat looked glossy. Other male dogs started sniffing around me, but I wasn’t interested in them. I only had a nose for Errol.

Soon, Errol suggested going off in the bushes for a frolic. I wasn’t sure what he meant at first, but I had this overwhelming urge to, well, frolic, I guess, though I didn’t know what that involved. But I’d never had such a strong desire to do something like that with another dog. It was all I could think about for days, and I got so excited, lying at home, imagining what it would be like. Him sniffing my butt, then my ears, then…. I wasn’t sure what we’d do, but I knew we’d have to do it or I’d go barking mad.

So one day we sneaked off into the bushes – ‘we’ll have to be quick,’ Errol barked.

We were, and it was – well, not quite what I expected. It hurt a bit, but it was over very quickly, and all he did afterwards was bellow, then he scampered off. I could have done with a bit of a cuddle, paw to paw, and a nose-to-nose chat, but perhaps male dogs weren’t like that.

After my initial disappointment, I felt invigorated and emboldened. Desired. The experience went right up my nose. He was all I could smell for days. I got quite dreamy for a while, remembering his scent, imagining doing it again – but better this time. But he’d disappeared. I was barking to some other dogs who lived nearby, and then I heard he’d used the same chat-up to several other dogs, and my tail and my whiskers drooped. I felt a real fool.

 

www.suekittow.com

THE ECHOES OF LOVE – REVIEW AND INTERVIEW WITH AUTHOR JENNY ASHCROFT

Jane Cable reviews this fabulous historical romance

Where do I begin with this incredible book? With the sweeping love story at its gripping heart, or the impeccable historical research, or the phenomenal sense of place and time that had me living and breathing Crete in 1936 and during the Second World War? Or shall I just cut to the chase and tell you this will most likely be my book of the year.

In 1936, eighteen year old Eleni Adams returns from England to Crete to spend the summer with her Greek grandfather, something she has done every year since her mother died when she was a baby. But this summer is different; this summer she falls in love with Otto, the German boy staying in the villa next door, and I was as captivated by the breathlessness of young love, the intensity of feeling, as I was by the setting that made me feel as though I was really sitting above that cove near sun-drenched Chania.

But we all know our history, and in 1941 Crete was captured by the Germans. By that time Eleni is an SOE agent based on the island, and rather than leave she goes underground in the bombed out ruins of Chania to help to support the resistance. Meanwhile Otto is one of the first wave of fighters to be parachuted in; a reluctant Nazi, a man who stands against cruelty and reprisals, and of course the lovers’ paths cross once again.

Also running through the book is the transcript of an interview from 1974, given by the man who, it becomes apparent, betrayed Eleni. A man who knew her well. A man who she trusted.

This book transported me absolutely, haunted my dreams, tore me apart, and put me back together again. It’s an absolute triumph, so I was delighted when Jenny Ashcroft agreed to tell me how, and why, she came up with the idea of the interview transcript.

 

JA: First of all, thank you so much for this wonderful review. I’m absolutely thrilled you enjoyed it! As for the transcripts, the idea for those actually came before the central idea for the book. Often when I’m trying to come up with something new, I’ll write scenes or bits of dialogue that spring into my mind, and one afternoon I found myself playing around with a prologue written in interview form.

I love historical documentaries, and just thought that the dynamic between a researcher and their subject could be a really rich one – especially if that subject is carrying some deep regret, or secret, from their past. So, I wrote a sample for my agent, she really loved it, and when, a couple of weeks later, I went back to her with my synopsis for The Echoes of Love, she was really enthusiastic about that too, but asked, ‘Is there any way you can get that transcript idea in?’ I thought there was, decided that they could work as being from a fictional BBC documentary commemorating the liberation of Greece, and that’s how the transcripts came to be woven through the text of Eleni and Otto’s story.

All very iterative, and I wish I could say that I knew from the start precisely what I was doing, but I never seem to know that with any book! For me, it really is the case that it’s only when I start to write that I come to realise where I want to go. But I’m so glad I did weave those transcripts in. They really did become such a core part of the story.

 

 

SUNDAY SCENE: JULIE HOUSTON ON HER FAVOURITE SCENE FROM THE NEXT VILLAGE VICAR BOOK

I think visitors to the north of England, and especially to the industrial urbanised towns of West Yorkshire, are always surprised to find themselves in the Yorkshire Dales – Skipton, Kettlewell and Grassington – and then, within another fifty miles or so, into the glorious Lake District. Wordsworth certainly knew what he was talking about when he called Grasmere, ‘The loveliest spot that man hath ever found’ and, writing in praise of Lake Ullswater, found it to be, ‘The happiest combination of beauty and grandeur.’

I have just completed my sequel to The Village Vicar (available January 2023) and, in this sequel, (probably to be titled The Girls of Heatherly Hall and available Summer 2023) I had a glorious time writing about Eva, one of the Quinn triplets, spending a weekend at an art retreat on Lake Ullswater.

To put the scene into context, Eva, newly separated from her husband, and utterly miserable, is in the Lake District for the weekend on an art course at one of the UK’s upmarket retreats, but also there on a fact-finding mission, prior to setting up her own similar art retreat back in West Yorkshire.

Eva arrives in the pouring rain for which the Lake District is renowned and, after a sleepless night, walks in the early hours of a now fine midsummer morning, down through the grounds of the retreat to the edge of Lake Ullswater itself. She is instantly captivated by the beauty and peace of the place:

…twelve acres of gardens and woodlands, as well as over half a mile of shore around the lake, and she set off down the beautifully kept gardens to the lake side.  The stunning mountain scenery to the south softened gradually to the gently undulating hills of the north and, as she walked, breathing in the early morning scents of Oriental Poppies, Astrantia and a mass of red and yellow roses she recognised but couldn’t identify, she began to feel calmer.

Eva spends the weekend learning to throw pots with the charismatic Russian, Andrea Zaitsev and, when he suggests an evening bike ride around Ullswater, she willingly concurs.

…the bike set off through the stable yard and down towards the large open wooden gate, before turning right onto the country road and accelerating at speed. Eva felt her heart and pulse escalate in unison with the bike as the Harley Davidson roared along, the warm summer evening breeze in her face and the rumble of the V-twin engine beneath her.

Andrea powered the bike through the village of Pooley Bridge before taking the main road which clung to, and followed, the margin of Ullswater lake to their left. Once on the main road, the bike gathered momentum and Eva realised they were probably well over the speed limit, but she felt totally safe in this man’s hands, surrendering to the glorious experience of flying through the summer evening as dusk began to descend and a large Strawberry moon rose over the lake itself.

Andrea slowed down completely as he took them through the villages of Watermillock and Glenridding where tents and B and Bs announced their popularity with tourists and then, leaving the A road, continued slowly down country lanes until he pulled up at a quirky-looking pub in the village of Patterdale.

‘Where the dogs come from,’ Eva said as, with slightly shaky legs, she dismounted the bike and waited until Andrea parked correctly in front of the pub.

‘Dogs?’

‘Patterdale terriers. No idea what they look like, but I guess they must have originated from here…’