Tag Archives: baby sensory

Wendy's baby diary – 7 months

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Time to cut off the milk supply?

Signs indicating it’s time to stop breastfeeding:

1) Baby’s got more teeth than you’ve got nipples

2) Baby tugs down your top

3) Baby tries to suck other parts of you, in the belief that mummy is made of milk

4) Friends and relatives say ‘You’re not still breastfeeding are you?’

5) Bitty

I think it’s time to hang up the Closed sign on the milk bar. Baby Dillon’s got six teeth. He’s eating solids (toast, blueberries). He’s rolling around the floor and knocking stuff off the TV stand. He’s sleeping through the night in his own bed, in his own room. He’s racing around the
kitchen in his baby walker (able to reverse and manoeuvre past the clothes
horse). What happened to my newborn? Before I know it he’ll be scaling Everest and
I’ll be crying into his baby clothes saying “you used to be this big”.

Baby Rash

Dillon was ill with a rash which turned out to be a viral
infection. It’s so scary to see a bright red rash on his trunk. The instant
concern is, is it meningitis? do the tumbler test. He recovered in a couple of
days, so we took him to visit my mum with a new travel cot, which of course he
didn’t sleep in, and when he doesn’t get any sleep nor do we. The travel cot
also functions as a portable prison ahem playpen so it will get used one way or
another.

Festive

I had thought Dillon was too young to appreciate Halloween
or Guy Fawkes but nearer the time I realised we could enjoy these special
occasions and get some memorable photos. My friend carved him a pumpkin lantern
and Dillon wore a monkey outfit for Halloween and went to a themed baby sensory
class and fancy dress day at his nursery where all the staff wore pyjamas.
Cute. Now I’m looking forward to his first Christmas. He’ll be dressed as baby
Santa with a red hat. The dog will have on a pair of reindeer antlers. And wearing
a knitted Christmas pullover will be Colin Firth. Who can stuff my turkey anyday.

Swimming

Baby swimming lessons have finished, it was a bit of a wash
out with nearly half the lessons cancelled or postponed so we didn’t learn a
lot. Dillon got used to being carried around in water. We might try again in the
New Year so that one day we can have our own Nevermind album cover.

Juggling

Can I manage baby Dillon and a Masters degree and go back to
work? I’m unsure. But you don’t know until you try. Some people thought I was
mad to be starting a MA when I was pregnant. It has been tough and I wouldn’t
still be on the course without support from certain people. Getting out of the
house to go to class has been positive for me. So many mums work full time then
it’s a shock to the system to be at home all day for 9 months to a year. So commuting
into London one or two days a week gives me a bit of normality. I think every
mum, however much she loves her kids, needs an occasional break.

So when I’m worried about running out of nursing pads and number
3 baby formula I can take my mind off it with French and Greek philosophers,
the classical dramatic paradigm and bright young things running about campus.

The main problem I have is burning the midnight oil as I can’t
concentrate until he’s gone to bed and by then I’m hankering for some medicine
(see previous baby diary http://frostmagazine.com/2011/10/wendys-baby-diary-six-months-guilt-isolation-and-men/), go to bed at 2am and get woken by Babezilla at 6.45am.

Congratulations

Lots of happy baby news – congratulations to our friends
Nathan and Bonnie on the birth of baby Samuel, Kevin and Louise who had baby
Aidan and my brother Terry and his wife Ola who had baby Matthew. And to our
friends L&M who are expecting. First timers – you don’t know what you’re in
for. Second timers – memory lapse?

Until next time

I think my get up and go, got up and went!

(c) Wendy Thomson 2011

Wendy Thomson is the editor of www.femalearts.com an online publication
which promotes women in the arts and in business.

Wendy's baby diary – cheeky monkey

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Baby Diary – 31 weeks

Ill

I started out with the intention to keep this baby column
weekly but it’s been nearly a month since my last baby update. There are a
couple of reasons and one is that Dillon has been ill. He got an infected toe
(we’re not sure how) and needed antibiotics for a week, this was followed by a
temperature for a couple of days and he’s had a cough for nearly a month. It is
scary and a panic when I hear any sniffle. Keep well baby D!

Controlled Crying

Dillon is nearly 7 months old and life is starting, just
starting to get easier. Bless his heart, Dillon has been sleeping through the
night for the last few weeks.  To get
there we had to go down the ‘controlled crying’ route. At first I didn’t want
to. We did the pick up, put down approach which is comfort the baby then leave him,
repeat as necessary, but when repeat is many times throughout the night it got
too much for both of us (stamina, exhaustion, feeding in desperation).

So what is controlled crying? Basically you leave your baby
to cry themselves to sleep. It’s not in a horrible, ignore the baby kind of
way, it’s in a loving, have I checked the baby and after feeding, winding,
changing, checking if teething, temperature, breathing is everything else ok
and telling him you love him and putting the lights out, you let him cry his
little heart out until he falls asleep. Yes it feels heartless and horrible and
wrong. But our little boy is 80 percentile he’s not going to waste away from
lack of milk and booby at night he can definitely sleep without it. After some
reassurance from my friend, we let Dillon cry himself to sleep and he cried for
about 20 mins. The next night between 10 and 15 mins. That was it. Joy!  For 10 hours the baby is asleep and I am free.
Freedom!

Nursery

Dillon has started at nursery two days a week so that I can
attend Uni two days a week. Oh the guilt of leaving him with someone else. But
the staff are really nice, the nursery has a good vibe about it and it does me
some good to be in an intellectual environment twice a week. I worry about him,
but he’s a sociable, loving baby, I think he’s happy there.  At six months old he’s also the youngest baby at
the nursery as most people go back to work after maternity leave of 9 months to
one year, another reason to feel guilty. But he seems to be getting a lot of
attention from the staff as the youngest, neediest baby which makes me feel
better. He also hasn’t formed that strong attachment to me yet, so when I say
bye bye, he doesn’t notice me leave, he’s busy eyeing up the toys and the other
babies.

Easier for Dad to
Leave the House

Since he’s working full time it’s easier for Dillon’s dad to
get out of the house 5 days a week. Sometimes I’ve been a little jealous that
he gets to leave, in a thoughtless grass is always greener way. Because I know how
well tended the lawn is on my side of the fence. And I’m not talking lady
garden. I’m happier being at home with Dillon. The gig that Dad went to which
turned into a 24 hour absence felt a bit much, especially when it looked set to
repeat the next weekend (but it’s not happening now). I appreciate that we both
need a break and we take it in turns to babysit.  Yes I’ve missed a lot of theatre before and
after Dillon was born, but I’ve read a lot of books, watched a lot of TV,
films, listened to radio, even got to the cinema (thanks to the Baby Scream
club), met up with other mums at Baby Sensory classes and my NCT group and with
my mum friends, we’ve taken Dillon to baby swimming classes, even church once a
month. The isolation I had felt is diminishing – just got to get out with the
baby!

Pushchairs

Dillon’s travel system has been good in a lot of ways but
boy is his car seat heavy and the whole thing is bulky, so we’re looking into a
lightweight pushchair to make it easier when dropping him off at nursery. I just
don’t understand why the majority of pushchairs are designed so that the baby
faces forwards (not towards mum).  I only
see problems with it, because to check on your child you have to stop, walk to the
front, deal with your baby then return to the back. Anytime your baby cries,
needs a drink or food, has a runny nose, their clothing needs adjusting you’ve
got to stop and go to the front of the pushchair (and when it’s crowded on the
pavement annoy all the pedestrians behind you).

More (inexpensive) rear facing pushchairs please!

Happy Halloween

© Wendy Thomson 2011

Wendy Thomson is the editor of www.femalearts.com an online publication
which promotes women in the arts and in business.

Wendy's Baby Diary: 19 Weeks – Who's Holding The Baby?

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Childcare

This week, I’d like to discuss the emotive issue of childcare – who to leave your baby with, from what age and what your options are.

Parents

There is an argument for mums to look after their children full time until they go to school and I think that is what my mum did for me. You could even home school if you wanted to continue being with your children full-time and believed that was in their best interest.

I’m finding the childcare situation hard. I love being with my son and he is my responsibility. At the same time, childcare is so demanding that, occasionally, I want a break to be ‘me’ again and not the constant food source / entertainment / companion. We’re in a fortunate situation that Dillon’s grandparents want to babysit for us when they can, but we are also looking into a nursery place for when I go back to my studies and to work.

Nursery

The advantages of a nursery are that your child learns to socialise with other children from a young age, to share, to interact and be stimulated, even educated. I think the main disadvantages are going to be if it’s not a good nursery. There is also the cost (up to £60 a day), which is hopefully outweighed by you being able to earn a salary.

Another consideration is the waiting list. I had no idea how long it can take to get a place. It can take up to months, especially for popular nurseries.  Some mums even sign up for a nursery place while they are pregnant! I was told the best start date for a baby is September / October, because a bunch of kids leave in September when they start school and all the younger age ranges move up a class. By January, most nurseries are full again.

Relatives

Relatives may have no charge attached but it’s important to not take them for granted. Some grandparents almost want to be a parent again and they may offer full time childcare, and in some situations this is the only viable financial solution for a family.

Nanny

Other options are a childminder or a nanny or au pair but I’m not looking for full time childcare and I don’t want someone looking after Dillon in our home. I think the main disadvantage of an individual is if they wanted to be abusive or neglectful there is no-one around to notice. At a nursery, there are a lot of staff and more controls are in place over professional standards of care and competence.

The only way you can tell if a nursery is right for you is by visiting a nursery in person. I went to see two last week and both were well advertised, one was rated Good in an OFSTED report, the other OUTSTANDING and within the first ten minutes of being in each nursery I knew that one wasn’t right for my son and the other one was.

Babies’ age

In terms of age, I’m looking for Dillon to start at nursery two days a week from six months old.  Maternity leave in the UK is allowed for up to 12 months, so six months may seem very young, but some nurseries accept babies from six weeks old. I was told that the average age for babies starting at nursery is currently between nine and 12 months old. A benefit for starting childcare at six months or earlier is that the baby is not so attached to the parent that they get upset when you leave them.

Whether Dillon misses me or not at nursery, I know I will find it hard to leave him there. But I want to provide for him and I want to be a good role model. I hope it all works out.

What the baby has been doing this week

Dillon is a smiler. For the first few weeks of their life babies only smile when they pass wind! and they start to genuinely smile from between six and eight weeks old. I wish I had written down when Dillon first smiled or laughed, but it is genuinely delightful when he does and he has been doing so for a good six weeks, maybe longer. He responds very well to people smiling at him if they hold their faces close and he imitates other people’s laughter.  In the past couple of weeks he has noticed our dog fetching balls and toys and this makes him laugh.

Classes

We’ve recently signed Dillon up for baby sensory classes and also to swimming classes starting in September, so I’ll report on those when they start. I went to a free taster class for the baby sensory and it was very good for the children, a lot of songs, baby signing, toys, a puppet show, a light show (felt like an early introduction to children’s theatre!) and a chance to meet other mums and have a chat. Dillon spent the hour staring at everyone and everything and slept really well afterwards.

Until next time – if you work with children, please be good to them!

© Wendy Thomson

Wendy Thomson is the editor of www.femalearts.com an online publication which promotes women in the arts and in business.