Tag Archives: birth

Five Simple Steps To Beat Baby Blues Naturally

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Five simple steps to beat BABY BLUES naturally

It comes from nowhere and catches you off guard.  Those feelings of being vulnerable, emotional, sad, tearful and sensitive may make it difficult to believe that it is supposed to be the happiest time of every woman’s life.

Don’t worry, you are not alone! Postnatal anxiety, also known as ‘baby blues’, affects 85% of women and may occur on the day of the birth, the day after or not at all. Despite those overwhelming feelings, remember it is a normal reaction after having a baby.

‘Crying and confusion are experienced by most women and are partly due to the hormone changes experienced during the labour and can also be connected to when the milk comes through. But for some 15% of women, this despair and tearfulness continues and develops into post-natal depression’, explains Dr Marilyn Glenville, the UK’s leading nutritionist and an author of The Nutritional Health Handbook For Women.

Before you start worrying, follow these five simple steps to beat baby blues naturally and start enjoying motherhood!

Take a break

Make sure you find time to rest. Permanent sleep deprivation is the biggest cause of anxiety and low mood. Instead of catching up on all those chores that have piled up, try to coordinate your rest periods with your baby.

‘You may need to ask for help with the housework and other chores so that you can have time to rest, sleep, eat properly and also spend time getting to know your baby. It is a good idea to get out the house on your own; it can feel quite overwhelming to suddenly have someone depending on you twenty-four hours a day. Giving birth may bring up unresolved emotional issues from the past that needs to be dealt with. Counselling may be very helpful if this has happened’, Dr Glenville suggests.

Keep your sugar levels at bay

It is important that you make sure that you are eating little and often. Keeping your blood sugar in balance is crucial for helping you through this time as it directly affects mood and energy. ‘Aim to eat complex and unrefined carbohydrates as part of your main meals – this means choosing brown instead of white (wholewheat bread, brown rice and wholemeal flour). Don’t forget about breakfast, porridge and oatmeal is a good choice. Do reduce and preferably avoid stimulants including tea, coffee, chocolate, smoking and canned drinks with caffeine’, explains Dr Glenville.

Too much copper is no good news

Mineral imbalances or deficiencies can also contribute to ‘baby blues’. One of the most important nutrients during this difficult time is zinc.

Zinc and copper are antagonists, which means that high levels of copper reduce zinc and vitamin B6. Once you are pregnant, copper levels in the blood tend to rise dramatically and remain high for up to a month after giving birth as it stimulates the uterus.* This can cause what feels like depression: extreme fears, anxiety, sleep problems, paranoia and even hallucinations. ‘High levels of copper that decrease zinc can be dangerous, especially for a new mum, as she may be already low in this mineral after giving birth. Zinc deficiency can cause stretch marks, white spots on fingernails, decreased wound healing, loss of appetite and low mood. Make sure you are taking good multivitamins and minerals, the ones you took during pregnancy are fine but add some extra zinc’ (recommended daily intake is 50mg of zinc a day), advises Dr Glenville. Try Nature’s Plus Zinc (www.nutricentre.com, £8.59).

Fatty acids

During pregnancy, women are constantly being deprived of fatty acids because of the physical demands of growing fetus. ‘Omega 3 fatty acids are proved to increase levels of serotonin so they are essential in fighting depression and anxiety. Try to include salmon, avocado and nuts in your daily diet. If you don’t like fish, choose a good quality omega-3 supplement such as Omega 3 by Quest Vitamins (www.revital.co.uk, £6.19).’ recommends Shona Wilkinson, Head Nutritionist at www.nutricentre.com.

Balance your hormones

‘Try to take milk thistle every day to support the liver and gall bladder. This powerful herb can help the liver to deal with toxins and process excess hormones from the body. In addition, it is an excellent promoter of milk production, so will help with breast-feeding as well’, says Shona.

*http://metabolichealing.com/zinc-copper-imbalances-immense-biochemical-implications/

 

 

Why a Caesarian Can be a Positive Birth Experience

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Catherine Balavage I didn’t give enough thought to how my son would be born. I just knew it would be painful. I would put the baby clothes, we bought, to my bump and wonder at just how lucky we were to be having a child. It felt like such a happy miracle it didn’t even feel real, even as he kicked inside me. Little did I know just how hard his birth would be.

I went into labour with a positive mindset. I am a worrier by nature so I can’t say there were not moments when I did not contemplate the worst, but overall, I was feeling strong, happy and positive. We were so excited to finally meet our son. For such a worrier, I wasn’t that worried. The human race has survived thousands of years. Women have given birth at home, in caves and even in cars. It was going to hurt but I have always had a high pain threshold. I was confident I could manage the birth. So when I went into labour on a Sunday evening I did not think it would be long until we met our child. What followed was over 80 hours of hell followed by something glorious: a C section.

A lot of negativity is said about the C section. Some people claim it is the easy choice, it isn’t, the recovery is a bitch.  Others say it isn’t natural, it may not be ‘natural’ but it has saved countless human lives so hurray for medical science. I, however, have nothing but praise. After 80 hours of labour our son was in distress, the umbilical cord was wrapped around his neck twice and his heartbeat kept on dropping. I switched off and just concentrated on the best case scenario, knowing that panic would just make the situation worse.

As the surgeon who did my caesarean explained why I should have an emergency caesarian she looked almost like an angel to me. Within twenty minutes, my son was born. The obstetrician team at Kingston Hospital who did my C section were amazing. Despite being paralysed from the waist down and being naked underneath my hospital gown I felt safe. They were truly wonderful and I still think of them when I look at my little boy. My little boy who’s life they saved. The midwife even stayed with me the entire time, from the morning when my baby was in distress, until just after noon when he was born. There is an obsession with natural birth these days, and as I was wheeled into the theatre I did feel like I had failed, but the only thing that really matters about childbirth is a healthy mother and child. How that happens doesn’t matter in the end, and that is never more true than when they put the baby in your arms. My C section was not only a positive experience, it saved the life of my son. What could possibly be negative about that?

 

 

The Baby Show Review | 2015 Highlights

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The Baby Show Review The Baby Show Review 2015

You may have noticed by now that Frost Magazine has a new(ish) parenting section. To find great articles for it, and have a bit of fun, I headed to The Baby Show at the Excel Centre. The Baby Show is the UK’s leading event for bump, baby and beyond. This year it also incorporated The Work & Family Show. a section sponsored by My Family Care and dedicated to helping new parents return to work after having a family – giving them access to a range of ideas for starting up their own business and advice on how to make the successful transition to the role of a working mum or dad. The Baby Show itself is sponsored by Made for Mums.

The Baby Show Review talks

There is a lot to do at The Baby Show and you really get your money’s worth. There are a lot of great exhibitors and you can buy pretty much anything you could ever want for your offspring as well as getting plenty of advice. In fact there was over 200 brands exhibiting including Mothercare.com, iCandy, Chicco, Emma’s Diary, mamas & papas, Maxi-Cosi, Quinny, Stokke and Tommee Tippee. There was plenty of talks on The Baby Show stage and the Work & Family Show stage. On The Baby Show stage nutritionist and author, Annabel Karmel MBE gave a great talk on weening, leaving the audience feeling inspired. Other experts who gave great talks included breast-feeding gurus Clare Byam-Cook and Geraldine Miskin, sleep experts Jo Tantum and Lisa Clegg, fitness guru, Michelle Heaton and child safety expert, Tracey Taylor from the British Red Cross. Tracey was great and showed the audience how to save their baby’s life. It was fascinating stuff and I can recommend taking a Red Cross class on first aid for your baby.

The Baby Show Review sling

Treading the boards of The Work & Family Show stage experts include Daily Telegraph journalist and author, Bryony Gordon, Stylist Editor, Lisa Smosarski, business coach and founder of CEO Mums, Nicola Huelin, Chief Executive of Working Families, Sarah Jackson and prize-winning journalist and former editor of Psychologies and Good Housekeeping, Louise Chunn.

Louise Chunn gave a great talk on being a working mother. Louise also talked about the fact that her own mother was always starting businesses and that her most read article was one about her regrets about being a working mother.

This year’s charity partner was Theodora’s Children’s Charity which works hard to fund laughter in children’s hospitals, hospices and specialist care centres across the UK.  They train ‘Giggle Doctors’ who are professional performers such as magicians, singers, actors and musicians, to bring magical moments and laughter to brave children in difficult times.  It is a worthy cause so donate if you can.

The Baby Show Reviewannabel

Highlights on The Work & Family Show included:

A CV Master Class – how to make your CV stand out from the crowd after a career break

Building your Network – building relationships

Balancing work and family

Building your personal brand – gaining confidence and believing in yourself

Visitors will listen to industry experts and inspirational working mums give their advice on how to balance work and family and choose the career path best for them.  The Baby Show stage will also host a dedicated session on Shared Parental Leave and what it will mean.

Other highlights of The Baby Show include:

Catwalk shows with all the latest fashions in maternity, baby and toddler wear

Exclusive show offers and competitions from top parenting brands

A complimentary crèche where parents can drop off their little ones

The Baby Show Stars’ themed competition held by Bumpkins Photography where the Show’s cutest baby will be awarded a high end, exclusive photo shoot

Dedicated baby facilities including the Tommee Tippee feeding area where parents can take advantage of heating and sterilising equipment, complimentary baby food and a comfortable space for breast feeding.

 

www.thebabyshow.co.uk / www.theworkandfamilyshow.co.uk

The Baby show was a brilliant event. I learned a lot and there is a lot to do. It takes a full day to go around all of the stands and listen to the talks. There is also an option for networking and a complimentary crèche so you can take a look around without your little ones. The Baby Show will be in Birmingham in May next, then Olympia in London in October, followed by ExCel again next February. Catch it if you can.

The Baby Show Review pregnancy

Birth Made Easy Book Review

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birth made easyI have previously interviewed Paola Bagnall. She had a lot of great things to say about giving birth. Now, let’s get down to the book.

The book has a great overview of pregnancy, both Pre and Post. It also comes with a free self hypnosis CD. For those interested in hypnobirthing (and there are rumours that Kate Middleton has joined them) this book is great. Paola believes that pregnancy is not a medical thing but a natural thing that the body is supposed to do. Although I don’t agree that pregnancy is not a medical thing, her ideas are interesting and certainly have merit. She is a qualified hypnotherapist and healed her own shoulder using the power of her mind.

This book has a lot of great information in it for any mother-to-be. Chapter one is about hypnosis and other chapters are about breathing, the biology of the female body, and the biology of birth. They are all very informative and fascinating.

There is also a chapter on how to use the CD. In the getting ready for birth chapter there are a lot of great tips, followed by an entire chapter or problem solving in, ‘What To Do if You Have….’ Nausa and vomiting are covered. As are C-sections and having a large baby.

The books tells you how to use the three stages of hynothearapy for the birth in an easy to understand way and has an entire chapter on how to disassociate yourself from the feelings of the contractions.

The last two chapters are what to do after the birth, a great chapter with some exercises on how to get back into shape, health tips, and enjoying your time as a mother.

This is a very good book for women who want a natural birth, and even has great tips for those who don’t. I can’t say it has convinced me to have a natural birth when I decide to have children, but the information is there for those who do.

Birth Made Easy – The positive and enjoyable way to have a baby easily and naturally using self-hypnosis

Interview with Birth Made Easy Author Paola Bagnall

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birth made easyFor our readers who are mothers-to-be we interviewed Paola Bagnall, author of Birth Made Easy. The book review is here. In the meantime enjoy the interview and please comment your thoughts below. Thank you.

I really liked how the book had advice on every aspect of pregnancy and birth. What is the biggest gem you can give to mothers-to-be?

 

To look forward to the birth with excitement and to work with your intuition and trust that your body is designed to give birth, which it is.

 

The book is big on relaxation, is this the most important thing when giving birth? How does one achieve this?

 

Yes relaxation is very important. The late Dr Grantley Dick-Read (1890 – 1959) visited a woman giving birth at her home in Whitechapel in London.  She declined his offer of chloroform, and gave birth without undue problem.  After the delivery, he asked her why she did not want chloroform and she replied, “It didn’t hurt.  It wasn’t meant to, was it?”.  Dr Dick-Reid actually said then that relaxation is the key to a good birth and in his book, Childbirth without Fear, he returned to women their rightful gift of a truly natural birth.

 

Today we are told that giving birth is painful and so many people believe this.  TV programmes like One Born Every Minute also reinforce this.  When you are relaxed you cannot feel fear and this is what hypnobirthing is all about.

 

Relaxation is achieved by visualisation of a favourite place, the use of colours, focusing on the breath and self-hypnosis – all of which are described in the book.  When you are relaxed your body opens up easily and so the baby flows out.

 

What was your own experience of pregnancy and giving birth like?

 

I have two sons and I gave birth to both naturally and relatively easily. The first one took six hours and the second eleven hours.  I am a biologist as well as a hypnotherapist and so I knew that my body could do this and also I was very excited about the process and looking forward to the experience.

 

When I gave birth 39 years ago we were given Pethidine automatically to help with the contractions.  I hated this as it caused me to hallucinate!  I wish I knew then what I know now about self-hypnosis as I would have been much more in control than I was.  Even so both my births were empowering experiences!

 

The book is about giving birth naturally. Do you think a natural birth is better?

 

If you can give birth naturally, I personally feel this is best because it should be a magical, empowering experience, where you are in control.  A natural birth also prevents the side effects of intervention and chemical drugs.

 

When someone has a headache or a medical procedure they generally use painkiller, why not do so when giving birth? It is the only medical thing that some people do without the help of painkillers. How is it different?

 

I’d just like to say that birth is not a medical thing!  It is a natural process and as such is not meant to hurt.  It is the medics in fact who have made it painful.

 

All pain is subjective and different for different people. If you think ‘pain’ then you get ‘pain’.  I feel contractions are different from ‘pain’.  They are intense pressure, good pressure, as they result in the birth of your baby.  I have suffered pain far worse than my contractions.  So think ‘good contractions’ and this alters your mind-set.

 

Of course using painkillers (epidural) may be what some people want and that is OK.

My book does not suggest that you have to have a natural birth.  This is a choice that the mum-to-be must make.  I simply suggest ways to achieve that goal.

 

Do you think the power of the mind can control the body?

 

Most definitely! We have the expression “mind over matter”.  We have the most amazing resource in our unconscious minds that most of us do not tap into.  By using positive affirmations and self-hypnosis we can use this innate ability we all have to make changes in ourselves for the better.

 

I got into hypnotherapy as I had a very painful shoulder injury that the medical profession could not help me with.  I learned to tap into this inner power and heal my shoulder using self-hypnosis. This is what showed me how useful self-hypnosis could be in giving birth. And why I created my own Inner Power Hypnobirthing.

 

Will everyone be able to achieve a natural birth?

 

A natural birth may not happen for everyone, as things just do happen which make it not possible.  If the baby is breach, or with complete placenta previa, where the placenta covers the exit for the baby, or if the baby is distressed in any way, then a C-Section has to be done in the best interests of the mother and baby.  However, hypnobirthing helps you to remain calm and in control in such situations.

 

Do you think you can get back into shape easily after giving birth as long as you work hard?

 

Yes, I do, though this is easier for some people than others.  Part of my hypnobirthing package is to help mums get back to their pre-pregnancy weight, shape and dimensions.  Simple exercises as shown in my book and a sensible diet help to achieve this.

 

Tell us about the self-hypnosis CD.

 

The self-hypnosis CD is to be listened to on a daily basis prior to the birth.  It uses visualisation, colour and positive affirmations to programme the unconscious mind to have a natural childbirth.  It is a bit like putting a program into a computer.  When you hit ‘play’ the program starts.  So the trigger for my CD is the first contraction, or the waters breaking, and then the entire program goes into effect almost automatically.  The CD takes you through pregnancy, the three stages of birth, healing up after the birth, bonding with the baby, breast-feeding easily (if you choose to do this) and getting your figure back.

 

What is the best advice you have for women giving birth?

 

Getting yourself into a positive frame of mind using hypnobirthing and start this as early as you can in your pregnancy so you have a beneficial expectation and you look forward to the birth with joyful anticipation.

Thank you Paola.

Birth Made Easy – The positive and enjoyable way to have a baby easily and naturally using self-hypnosis

 

The Kitchen Baby | Book Review

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The Kitchen Baby is about the author delivering his fifth child on the kitchen floor of the family’s Kent farmhouse without medical assistance. It also tells the story of how the author became a father. Five times! Through infertility, going broke and all of the problems that holding a relationship together brings. It is a story of triumph over adversity.

The Kitchen Baby is a well written and thoughtful book. Men really do not have much of a voice when it comes to pregnancy and childbirth. True, they are not the ones that carry the baby for nine months and give birth, but they are still a large part of raising a child. That said, I do not think this book is just for men, women will enjoy it too.

More men should write books about pregnancy and fatherhood. It is an untapped market. Quite often men are just left to fend for themselves. Or course women are the ones that go through pregnancy and childbirth, but it takes both parents to raise a child. Men go through all of those sleepless nights too. No one should have to suffer on their own and fathers never get enough credit.

The Kitchen Baby is not just a book about the author delivering his fifth child in the kitchen of the family home, it is also about a man who didn’t want children becoming a father of five, even through fertility problems and the other obstacles that life throws.

The book flows very well and Kennedy is obviously a talented writer. He has a very natural and entertaining style. Angus does have a tendency to go off subject occasionally, but it does not harm the book and he is a good writer and the book works. It is entertaining and informative. I really enjoyed it and I recommend it for both sexes, whether they are parents or not.

The Kitchen Baby is available here.

Wendy's baby diary – Six months! – Guilt, isolation and men

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Six months old

Dillon was six months old on Monday the 3rd October 2011. A lot has happened in this first six months including his christening , baby swimming classes, health centre visits and weigh ins, the
dog eating the midwifes shoes, the whole experience of giving birth, going to University, starting my website http://www.femalearts.com, being off work, weaning the baby, his milestones including Dillon getting his first baby teeth, sitting up, rolling around on the floor, playing with his feet, smiling and laughing and interacting with objects and people.

I’d like to thank Catherine Balavage at Frost Magazine for offering me this blank canvas to write about Dillon. I wanted to document these moments so that in the future I can look back (hopefully Dillon will also read it) and have a record of this wonderful, life changing time.

It’s been a brilliant six months but it’s also been tiring, stressful and a lot of hard work. I’ve said in my diary about how the baby is progressing, the goods, toys and clothes we have bought for him, what activities he is enjoying and how he’s developing but I don’t think I’ve said so much about my feelings. The following topics have been on my mind recently…

Men with babies

Recently there has been a couple of TV Doctors with babies – Doc Martin has a baby, James Cordon was left holding the baby in Doctor Who – portraying what it feels like for the dad to be the primary carer –the Doctor Who story was about panic and fluster with the conclusion that dads
are actually protective loving individuals and the mums are competent women who make lists and mother both their partner and baby.

Nothing is that clear cut and I’m not sure there is a big gender difference in the way we are parents, it may just boil down to the amount of physical time spent with the baby = the more you know them = the more competent you become at dealing with them.

The only thing that aggravates me with stories on TV about dads coping alone with babies is that there aren’t an equivalent number of stories about mums coping alone with babies. Because it isn’t all confident list making and natural mothering instincts, it’s often panic, confusion, stress,
isolation and guilt.

Isolation

It’s lonely being a stay at home mum. Even though it is through choice I miss chatting to colleagues, I miss talking to my husband, I miss my family, and I miss my friends. Having another adult in the house during the day (e.g. when relatives have come to stay and at the weekend when the baby’s dad is at home) makes so much difference to my life. All the bags of stuff needed
to carry around for the baby, all the preparation that’s needed before I can leave the house, all the attention and love and care that Dillon needs – is so much easier when it’s shared.

Recently I have realised I need to make more of an effort to see my friends – especially friends who are available in the daytime. Getting out daily with the dog and the baby for walks and taking baby to classes or shopping is something but it’s not the same as being with people who know and care about me, who I can have a proper conversation with.

I can see why going back to work begins to look appealing because you can start to be yourself again and have adult interaction without constantly thinking about the baby’s needs and their safety. But employment means childcare. Which brings me onto my next subject – guilt.

Guilt

As a parent there is one thing you can be certain of – a steady almost constant feeling of guilt. I think it stems from conflict between personal needs/wants and that of your child.  My current guilty feelings are – guilt for using formula, guilt for starting weaning before six months, guilt for not weaning successfully, guilt for not establishing a pattern (of eating/sleeping), guilt for trying to establish a pattern, guilt for not living up to other people’s parenting expectations, guilt for not
returning to work yet, guilt for arranging childcare, guilt for doing my master’s degree, guilt for not being sure, guilt over baby’s eczema not clearing up, guilt for letting the dog spend time with baby, guilt for separating dog from baby, guilt for daily dressing of baby in babygro’s in attempt to stop skin contact with whatever is causing the eczema, guilt for not taking enough photos of baby, guilt for not posting all the thank you cards yet, guilt for not buying enough things for baby, guilt for spending so much money, guilt for wanting my boobs back, guilt that he cries a lot, guilt whenever I let him cry before going to him, guilt that I’m spending time writing this!

There’s too much guilt, worry, anxiety and the only consolation is the thought that other people may be feeling the same way.

Self-Medication

One of the best ways to cope is summed up with a quote from my friend BenJohn’s facebook update.

“Youngsters, you probably think booze is for enjoying and having fun. Let me assure you it is a medicine for those with children to let them relax in the gaps when they’re asleep.”

© Wendy Thomson 2011

Wendy Thomson is the editor of www.femalearts.com an online publication which promotes women in the arts and in business.