Tag Archives: Funny

Rounding up the Week {Miscuity}

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I hope you’re having a lovely day, here’s some of the weeks best thingummies to distract you from work. Hope you enjoy them.

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Slime mould that makes decisions like humans.

Brainless single cell organism that makes decisions like humans, read the full article here, then go and watch some disturbing videos.

The best quitting story of the week.

Stephen Slater quit his job at JetBlue after launching into a tirade, grabbing a can and jettisoning down the emergency ramp. We’ve all had days like that.

The other quitting story…

When Jennifer the PA quit her job using a dry wipe board and 33 photos outting her boss for playing farmville everyone thought “wow that’s amazing because no one would ever do that”. It turned out no one ever did do that and it was a hoax all along. The actress playing Jenny turned out to be Elyse Porterfield who applied for the role through Actors Access.

Freak storm in Finland ruins a lovely day within seconds.

Watch out for the scary face at 00:56 and all the birds deciding they’ve had enough. [via Boing Boing]

Dear Donovan {DONOVAN}

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Dear Donovan

Who was your first kiss and what was her name

Darren, Ipswich

Well, Darren Ipswich, if that is infact your real name, and not one of the editors taking pity on the fact no one askes me questions anymore and have written the most pathetic Miss Magazine style question aimed at the likes of Chico and the Eyebrow-With-Legs from Busted!

I will humor you, girls and answer it anyway

A girl called Jenny, I was 4 she was 6…We tongued each other in the school yard at my primary school. Ill be honest she was minging.

Looking back there were at least three others who were better looking playing hopscotch.

Happy??

Expected more of an answer?….Well tough.

I would like to bring to your attention the fact there were Siamese twins in my primary school!…should have really gone for one of ’em! Practically a threesome!

Fact- an upside to being a Siamese twin is that you never have to worry over who’s gonna be your partner on school trips.

That’s me done.

Off to watch the three amigos.

DONOVAN

Porcupine who thinks it's a puppy {Misc-uity}

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Oh it’s so super cute! It actually chases it’s tail at one point!

Tarp Surfing {Misc-uity}

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Tarp Surfing. Get a tarp (tarpaulin) pick up one end whilst someone skates underneath it and woah and behold it’s like surfing, only you don’t need to get your hair wet, or go to the coast.

Bored DONOVAN want's your questions {Dear DONOVAN}

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Look guys, this is what happens if no one sends DONOVAN any questions…poor thing. He’s going spare worrying because you’re all worrying instead of sending him your problems. Let’s humour him and pretend we’re listening.

Been bored out of my skull, ’cause no fuckers been asking me questions!….Jesus! even resorted to formspring but still no1 likes me ! Cant think why?

Bloody racists.

Wouldn’t it be if you swapped the toy in a happy meal for a bum plug and lube! Then watch the parents face when the child pulls it out! Then the parent screams at you YOU EXPECT MY CHILD TO PLAY WITH THIS?!!

….not funny? Fuck you… I pissed myself when Mcdonalds sacked me! Then in protest stuck a chip up my ‘japs eye’!…It burned but was worth it to see their faces.

I have come up with a new game; I bought a Triangle from a music shop. I sit on the seat directly behind the drivers wall and ‘ting’ it randomly…so it stops and no one gets off so there is an awkward pause b4 the doors close…then do it again, he sees nothing flash up to say the bell has been pressed and gradually thinks hes hearing things and going mad…but he has to stop in case the light that flashes to indicate isn’t working!! Doors always open no matter how many times you do it cause he can’t take the risk in case it is someone wanting to stop

……..anyway, this is my theory. I haven’t tried it yet…but I will.

Also Getting into a taxi and telling them to drop you off literally a few doors up from your house! You hand the standard taxi charge of 1 pound 20 or whatever it is and say sorry, my mate needs a taxi hell be out now (so you gain his trust again and interest) you walk out of sight behind a wall etc or even walk through the door if neighbors willing to be a part in your childish scheme! then put on a false moustache and remove a jacket or top over top and get in car…same thing again and again…and the winner is who out of your friends gets the furthest and how many stops you make…down side will be you’d still be out of pocket!

Up side is you could just do it with friends waiting at the houses to swap over…why not have the next person and so forth getting more and more bizarrely dressed? and at the end have the last person dressed as a chicken or pantomime dame?

as I said I’ve been very bored!! ask me questions dick heads!! (he loves you really)

Email the Frost and they will pass it on to me verbally as I don’t trust emails!

DONOVAN

by Stefan Pejic

Missing Missy {Miscuity}

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Apparently life as a freelance graphic designer can be stressful, dealing with clients wanting free logo’s with pie charts, deadlines and neighbours. This poor designer has to deal with his clients missing cat…Missy. I thought he did quite a good job…click here to see the whole story.

[27bslash6]

My Story [DONOVAN]

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Dear DONOVAN

What made you decide to be a comedian and where was your worst ever gig

Danny Cardiff

Hi Danny,

I started when I was 10! I was a very angry child and needed a source to vent that anger. I used to deliver TVs with my granddad’s friend but there was interference. So I stumbled along a working mens club in Swansea called ‘Penlan Anti-Social Club‘.

Every Wednesday I would perform 10 mins of shouting at the audience…and they loved it. Once they put me on as headliner to a racist ventriloquist and his pet duck Dingo McNeil.

I finally got enough cash to rent a small flat across the road which I shared it with my girlfriend at the time; A pole dancer called Crystal Cleavage. I was 12.

My big break didn’t come till I was 16 I went to watch Bobby Davro at the Grand Theatre Swansea. Half way through the first half his left leg suddenly fell off, the audience had no idea he was an amputee! He had kept it from the lime light all those years. He was too embarrassed to go back on, so, sensing a stampede of angry fans about to occur I ran onto the stage and started singing the theme from the Andrew LLoyd Webber musical Whistle Down the Wind. The audience stopped in amazement, they sat back down in cannon, I had them in the palm of my hand…Davro winked at me from the wings and said “your doing good kid” I shouted back “Fuck off you one legged liar” Davro became my mentor we toured together…him in the shadows keeping out of the public eye and me getting the laughs. But In 2007 I got a phone call “I’m leaving you….I have been approached by Eastenders” He said nervously.

I told him he Was a C*NT!! and If he took it I never wanted to see him or his stump again…he took it. ….where is he now eh? Crying somewhere that’s where.

There is my story, who cares what you think.

DONOVAN

What Sign?! I didn't see any sign! {Misc-uity}

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The worlds least effective sign. bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz……

[via haha.nu]