So yesterday was hard. The latter part anyway. I was okay until lunch times when, as I wrote yesterday,  I felt nausea and fainty and had a cup of tea. That made me feel better for a while and then for the rest of the day and night I had the most awful headache. Like someone had attacked me with a knife. My concentration was low and I felt lethargic. Because I cannot drink tea without sugar – frankly, I think it is one of the worst tastes in the world – I also have had minimal caffeine. This morning when I woke up I was so weak and dizzy I found it hard to get out of bed.

I felt optimistic until I went to the supermarket. Then just how much I was missing out on hit me. It was very hard and made my life seem less fun. What is wrong with biscuits and chocolate anyway? Later I watch a TV show and the characters are having a burger and coke. I realise it will be September until I can have a burger and coke again. I feel deprived. Which is silly in a world where a large portion of the population don’t have enough food or water.

Yet somehow in all of my silly sadness and yearning for another cup of tea comes a resolve: I will do this. At the moment my body is not liking it and neither am I, but I will do it. The jaffa cakes are still in the fridge, I have switched to camomile and spearmint tea and I have had a few pieces of fruit. On week one of the Mentor Me Off Sugar Programme you are allowed fruit but not on week two and three.

I have a delicious sea bass for supper and buy good wholemeal bread and cheese. I have the bread with some amazing olive oil I have been sent to review and realise there are other things in this world apart from sweet treats. Although if I just replace sugar with bread and cheese I will be fat in no time I do enjoy the treat.

Instead of deprivation I start to think about opportunity. The opportunity to rewire my body to a healthier me and the opportunity to eat new, different food. Even with my headache and my tiredness, I am excited and aware of all of the possibilities. Onwards.