Photo: King of Christmas Lights
Some Christmas facts for you:
The idea that Father Christmas is red-and-white because of Coca Cola branding is an urban myth.
In Britain, the traditional Christmas meal used to be a pig’s head and mustard.
Kissing under the mistletoe is thought to spring from Frigga, the Norse goddess of love, who was associated with the plant.
Frigga is an excellent name for a goddess of love.
In Greece, Italy, Spain and Germany, workers get a Christmas bonus of one month’s salary by law. However, in the first three, there probably won’t be such a thing as money by Christmas.
In Holland, Father Christmas (Sinterklaas) is accompanied by Black Pete (Zwarte Piet) who, legend has it, takes bad children away in a sack. To Spain. Seriously.
Here are the delicious Christmas offerings on Channel 4 this Yuletide. Jesus, did I just write Yuletide?
Week 51
Saturday 17/12/2011
10pm
Catherine Tate: Laughing at the Noughties
Catherine Tate leads a two-hour romp through the very best comedy of the ‘Noughties’. Catherine meets Alan Carr, David Walliams, Noel Fielding, Rob Brydon and her Doctor Who co-star, David Tennant, all of whom reflect on the greatest comedy moments in recent history.
Sunday, 18/12/2011
8pm
Home for the Holidays 1/7
A soon-to-be-married couple bring their extended families together for the first time in Channel 4’s brand new, live entertainment event. Can they survive their own family, 24 hours a day for a week, to win up to half a million pounds? The family have to live together, put up with each other and bond under one raucous roof in an enchanting Christmas country manor house that is not quite what it seems. With tantalising twists and unexpected turns, festive surprises, treats and celebrity guests, can the young couple keep everyone together as they face a festive family experience like nothing ever seen on television before?
Sunday, 18/12/2011
10pm
Brüno
(2009) Sacha Baron Cohen follows up his outrageous PC-busting mockumentary Borat… with this outrageous PC-busting mockumentary about a disgraced gay Austrian fashion journalist seeking fame and fortune in the US of A. Network premiere.
Monday, 19/12/2011
7:30am
Perfect Couples
The US comedy series about three couples trying different ways to keep the spark in their relationships alive comes to Channel 4. In the first episode, Dave is disappointed that Julia doesn’t make an effort with him anymore so they decide to put on their best clothes and hit the town. Amy and Vance have a misunderstanding about some bed bugs and Rex and Leigh plan an Italian holiday.
Monday, 19/12/2011
4pm
Deal or No Deal: Deal Panto
The world of pantomime and fairytales descends on the Dream Factory this December, as Noel the Genie oversees proceedings in the hope of granting some Christmas wishes on Deal or No Deal: Deal Panto. In these special editions, contestants in live play at five box will have the opportunity to rub the Genie’s lamp and make a wish, which could allow them to continue one box at a time, or even walk away with a holiday. But, the wrong choice could let The Banker look inside their box or they could end up leaving with a pair of his underpants!
Monday, 19/12/2011
8pm
The Year the Earth Went Wild
A look back at a year where almost every month was affected by a natural disaster. With a record-breaking cold winter, the tsunami in Japan, the extraordinary killer American tornado season, the floods in Australia and a hurricane in New York, 2011 has seen an onslaught of epic-scale climate and geological events across the world, all caught on camera in the most spectacular fashion.
Monday, 19/12/2011
9pm
King of Christmas Lights
Cutting Edge explores the world of extreme Christmas decorating, meeting people who live for adorning their houses in festive regalia every year. Throwing a spotlight on what Christmas means in contemporary Britain, the film follows these people as they plan for months, buying the latest equipment and music-sequencing software and spending much of their disposable incomes on nothing but lights. The programme provides an insight into their true motives, relationships under strain from overindulgent merriment, households pitted against their neighbours in a bid to make their decorations outshine all others, and communities united in their desire to light up the night sky.
Monday, 19/12/2011
11:10pm
Syria’s Torture Machine
An investigation into the detention and torture of Syrian civilians featuring shocking video evidence of men, women and children being subjected to beatings, whippings and more elaborate torture. Victims, refugees and activists who have experienced or witnessed such brutality at the hands of Syrian President al-Assad’s forces speak out. Their stories, combined with the torture footage, refute President Assad’s claims that his forces are simply quelling an armed insurgency.
Tuesday 20/12/2011
9pm
Jamie’s Christmas with Bells On 2/2
In the second of two festive specials, Jamie Oliver shows how to create an original Christmas Day menu featuring festive fiesta tacos, brussels with hustle, and bloody mary seafood platter.
Wednesday 21/12/2011
8pm
Kirstie’s Home for Christmas
Having mastered the 12 crafts of Christmas, for the second of her two festive specials Kirstie shows off her skills as once again she gets into the competitive spirit at a magnificent, and very merry, annual Christmas fair.
Wednesday 21/12/2011
9pm
Obsessive Compulsive Hoarder
In a pretty village in the Surrey stockbroker belt lives the infamous Mr Wallace, whose hoarding habits have spread across a million pounds-worth of property that used to belong to his parents. His detached bungalow, four-bedroom semi-detached house and separate double garage are all stuffed from floor to ceiling with newspapers and other household items. Cutting Edge is given unique access into his intriguing home, where no one else has ever ventured.
Thursday, 22/12/2011
9pm
London’s Burning
Set in Clapham Junction, London, London’s Burning is a dramatic interpretation of a single night of rioting and looting that took place in August 2011. Starring David Morrissey and Samantha Bond as senior police officers, London’s Burning tells how residents, shopkeepers and businesses dealt with the violence.
Friday, 23/12/2011
8pm
Come Dine with Me: Comedians Christmas Special
Four comedians do culinary battle in a bid to win £1000 for charity. Going head-to-head in this festive special are Sean Hughes, Gina Yashere, Paul Tonkinson and Duncan Norvelle.
Week 52
Saturday 24/12/2011
7:10pm
Hairspray
Adam Shankman’s adaptation of the 2005 musical stars John Travolta, Queen Latifah, Christopher Walken, Zac Efron and Elijah Kelley. Network Premiere.
Saturday 24/12/2011
10:50pm
Bill Bailey: Dandelion Mind
Captured in performance live, and featuring his trademark musical interludes, observations and stories of the road, Bill Bailey takes centre stage in Dandelion Mind, which is based loosely on the theme of doubt (or is it?) and features reflections on celebrity, TV, creationism, Michael Winner, and a brand-new French Disco re-working of Gary Numan’s hit, Cars.
Sunday, 25/12/2011
10am
Gordon’s Christmas Cookalong Live
This Christmas there’s no need to panic if you’ve left your festive food shop to the last minute, or the idea of cooking for the whole family fills you with dread. Help is at hand as Gordon Ramsay serves up an action-packed and irresistibly entertaining guide to cooking a fool-proof Christmas dinner – live on Christmas Day.
Sunday, 25/12/2011
2pm
Ice Age: A Mammoth Christmas
Special TV spin-off from the makers of the Ice Age film series. When Sid accidentally ruins one of Manny’s Christmas traditions, he’s told that he will now be on Santa’s naughty list. Sid heads to the North Pole with Crash, Eddie and Peaches in tow to plead his case directly to Santa Claus. Manny is worried when he hears that Peaches has gone with Sid and along with Ellie and Diego, treks to the North Pole to find her. Meanwhile, the gang accidentally destroy Santa’s workshop and have to pull off a miracle to save Christmas. Prod.Co: Fox Animation Studios
Sunday, 25/12/2011
4:15pm
Alternative Christmas Message
Channel 4’s traditional alternative to the Queen’s Christmas Day broadcast. First airing in 1993, the Alternative Christmas Message has previously featured an illustrious and varied selection of presenters, including the President of Iran, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, an injured veteran from the war in Afghanistan; Quentin Crisp; the Reverend Jesse Jackson; Doreen and Neville Lawrence; a 9/11 survivor; and The Simpsons.
Sunday, 25/12/2011
9pm
Alan Carr: Chatty Man Christmas Special
Settle in for a treat of festive frolics plus the odd song or two as Alan is joined on the sofa by Ruth Jones who talks about her new drama, Stella. David Walliams drops in to talk all things Christmas. Plus infamous twosome Jedward are on hand to cause mayhem in the studio. Music comes from the newly reformed Steps, who perform a medley of their greatest hits.
Sunday, 25/12/2011
11:05pm
So This Is Christmas
So This Is Christmas is a festive comedy offering brimming with the UK’s freshest comedians as they examine the good, bad and downright ugly aspects of our favourite national holiday. Based in a domestic winter wonderland, the comedians all re-live their best and worst Christmas moments.
Monday, 26/12/2011
6:35pm
Come Dine with Me: Celebrity Christmas Special
It’s high camp at Christmas as five plucky celebrities take to the stage for a festive pantomime special for five nights across the week. Taking part are singer Linda Nolan, Bianca Gascoigne, former Doctor Who actor Colin Baker, Dancing on Ice and Coronation Street star Danny Young and pantomime villain ‘Nasty Nick’ Bateman.
Monday, 26/12/2011
9pm
Bear’s Wild Weekend with Miranda
Bear Grylls takes Miranda Hart on a once-in-a-lifetime expedition to the spectacular Swiss Alps for an exhilarating new programme. Adventurer, Chief Scout and best-selling author Bear challenges novice Miranda to go far beyond her comfort zone with a series of exhilarating adventures during an intense two-day expedition. Miranda traverses a glacier, crosses crevasses roped to Bear, tackles deep snow in snow shoes, completes a huge boulder scramble and abseils down a waterfall.
Monday, 26/12/2011
10pm
Chris Moyles’ Christmas Quiz Night
Chris Moyles’ Quiz Night loves Christmas like no other quiz show and tonight’s instalment is a very special seasonal edition. Chris will be competing against mighty comedy actor James Corden, X Factor singing sensation Olly Murs and Pineapple Studio’s irrepressible Louie Spence as each endeavours to win their supporters in the audience a share of a festive thousand pounds.
Wednesday 28/12/2011
8pm
Jon Snow’s 2011
Jon Snow reflects on an extraordinary 12 months of news. It’s a personal recollection of the news stories that mattered to him. Some he witnessed first-hand, like the fall of Mubarak or the aftermath of the Japanese tsunami; others he covered from the studios of Channel 4 News; all left their mark on him and millions of others. The Arab Spring, the English riots and the Eurozone economic and financial crisis have all helped define 2011 but for Jon these stories were also linked by the phenomenon of social networks and instant global communication. This was also the year of Hackgate, when his own profession came under intense public scrutiny. And it’s the year he got an honorary degree from Liverpool University, 45 years after the same university chucked him out for student activism.
Wednesday 28/12/2011
9pm
The Untold Tommy Cooper
This one-off special looks at the untold life of British national treasure, comedian and magician Tommy Cooper. Fans as diverse as Johnny Vegas, Damien Hirst, Ozzy Osbourne, Sir Roger Moore, Alfred Molina and Reece Shearsmith talk about their love of Cooper.
Wednesday 28/12/2011
11:35pm
Ben Elton: Laughing at the 80s
Ben Elton presents this two-hour romp through the very best comedy of the 1980s. Featuring .Rik Mayall, Lenny Henry, Harry Enfield, Victoria Wood, Jimmy Tarbuck, Stephen Fry, Dawn French, Jennifer Saunders, Ade Edmondson, Jo Brand and Nigel Planer.
Thursday, 29/12/2011
9pm
Dorian Gray
(2009) Ben Barnes, Colin Firth and Ben Chaplin star in this gothic horror adaptation of Oscar Wilde’s cautionary fable. Network Premiere.
Friday, 30/12/2011
9pm
Comedy Showcase: The Angelos Neil Epithemiou Show
The Angelos Neil Epithemiou Show is a studio-based comedy entertainment show written by and starring Dan Skinner as his comic character Angelos Epithemiou.
Friday, 30/12/2011
9:30pm
Lee Evans: Access All Arenas
Lee Evans hosts a very special night showcasing his incredible stand up shows and TV series.
Phew, a good amount of stuff to watch! Merry Christmas from Frost.